The gift of giving· 0 comments · Living authentically
Give yourself permission without judgement.
The gift of giving is a “lifestyle” choice that just feels good. A lifestyle can represent anything that shows who we are as people. LifeStyle is not just about the clothes we wear it’s the day to day space we live in, our hobbies, the people we surround ourselves with and the choices we make to express ourselves in public.
Give yourself permission to learn, listen and be expressive confidently.
My personal frustrations with learning a different riding discipline, Dressage, after years of jumping, expressed a lifestyle behavior I was uncomfortable with. Instead of accepting or adapting to the self doubting behavior I asked my trainer, why was I being so challenged with the ride. I said, “She/Vera is so good with Sarah (rider pictured) what is about the way I ride, that makes it such a challenge besides time in the saddle or age”? Without a blink and his slight “all knowing” yet patient chuckle, he explained in one simple sentence, “A horse will remember the last rider on it’s back, not the current rider making the request. In addition, no matter how good or bad the technique, any changes made by a new rider would confuse her and require a subtle start over”. A light bulb moment for my riding experience and for the struggles I faced daily with how I expressed my lifestyle choices to others.
The lesson learned, and how my horse story ties into this article?
Consider this, the consistent choices I made from the start of my career and throughout about who I was and how I wanted to be perceived, were memorable, similar to the memory of my horse with the previous riders, be them good, bad or indifferent, they were imprinted. In order to imprint change with people, similar to my riding, it would take time, patience and a willingness to listen and grow, time to consistently alter the perception others may be holding onto through my actions by successfully giving them a view into who I was and wanted them to see, not just the clothes I wore and the position I held.
In order for others to see me as I wanted to be seen, I’d have to make some adjustments, let go of the “approval” seeking, be exposed, be open and be willing to accept who I am, what I can and want do for others to be “seen” differently, both inside and out of the “armor” of my clothes.
In other words, “Gift” myself with acceptance, share me, imperfections and all.
The perception or built in memory a human will hold onto can last forever unless a choice is made to create a new perception about who you want to be seen. At this point you might be asking, “How if I so chose, would I alter the perception others may have of me”?
Quite simply, alter the way you feel about yourself and take a “leap of faith” by trusting the choices you make about how you want to be perceived.
Who ever said a horse was not smart or that a life lesson couldn’t be learned by just one ride?